06 December 2006

Is God responsible for my hard work?

Last night, my wife and I finally broke down and did the cleaning that we should have done a month ago. I had to clean the bathroom (always my job) and that took about an hour (yes, it had been so long that it actually required that long to clean it). Plus, I had to fold all the laundry, which took about 40 minutes (yes, there were about 4-5 loads worth of unfolded laundry to be folded). And, I had to cook and wash pots last night as well, since my wife was away at her last Alpha class. We also got around to sorting out all our old receipts, mail, and other papers which cluttered the apartment. My wife replaced all the full garbage bags around the apartment (always her job; just as gross as the bathroom but a bit quicker). All these things take time, time, time, and lots of effort on both of our parts.

Later on as we're going to bed, my wife is praying, "Thank you, God, for helping us to clean up our apartment."

WHAT THE F*CK! I didn't see God lift a damn finger to clean up the apartment. Did God get down on his hands and knees and scrub the bathroom floor? Did God endure rotting meat smell to throw out the garbage? Did God root through the laundry to find matching socks?

No freakin' way.

Did God help us endure the cleanup? Not really. It was still an awful, tedious, backbreaking evening of work.

Did God even inspire us to do the cleaning? No - it was the biological sense of revulsion and claustrophobia arising from how dirty and piled-high everything had gotten. It had reached the point of being unhealthy, so urges kicked in to get it done.

Like the car crash victim who thanks God for her survival, she completely disregards the skills and hard work of the caring people around her. The firefighters and the paramedics saved the crash victim; likewise, we cleaned our own damn apartment.

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4 Comments:

At December 06, 2006 9:36 PM, Blogger beepbeepitsme said...

You should have replied. Thank god that you are to submit to my sexual desires when asked.

See how much she refers to god after that little spanner in the works. :)

 
At December 07, 2006 12:41 PM, Blogger King Aardvark said...

After asking that, the followup question would be "Let's see how much she submits to my sexual desires when asked." =P

 
At December 11, 2006 3:46 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Have you done anything about the boxes of crap you have piled up all over the place?

Garrett

 
At December 11, 2006 3:55 PM, Blogger King Aardvark said...

At least half of the piles of crap are now gone. Thanks for asking.

 

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