20 October 2008

Real Manifestation of God in “My Church”

Something spooky and powerful ALMOST happened the other day in “my church” (in quotations because it’s really my wife’s church – she just drags me there). I was in church minding my own business (trying to nap in my seat) when the pastor’s tone changed as he got very hot ‘n’ bothered during the sermon. “Today we've thought about Jesus, and we've talked about Jesus. But now, instead of just leaving like we usually do, we're going to actually ask Jesus to do something here. We're going to be in relationship with him and actually ask him to move.” Needless to say, I suddenly woke up.

“Holy turd pucks!” I exclaimed in my head, as I’m wont to do when surprised.

I actually became somewhat worried, nervous, and excited. Was their going to be crazy speaking in tongues? Was everyone going to sprout stigmata? Was Jesus’s giant, disembodied/ethereal head going to appear above us?

Then the pastor continued and told all those in the audience struggling with such and such a faith problem to stand up. They did. Then he instructed everyone to pray for them and their challenges. Then he told them to sit down. He then made everyone with another type of faith problem stand up. Everyone prayed for them, too. Then a third group stood up. More prayers.

Then, the pastor triumphantly proclaimed, “Doesn’t it feel much better to have actually done something?”

Oy. Seems like their “just talking” and their “actually doing something/Jesus manifests himself” are more or less the same damn thing. What a disappointment.

I went back to sleep.

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